Jan 15 2009
Dear Homeless Dude With The DVD Player
Dear Homeless Dude With The DVD Player,
I’m not sure that I have the words.
As I walked across the patio at the Coffee Bean on my way to the bank, I saw you sitting in a chair with your back to me. I immediately thought, “this guy has the dirtiest hair I’ve ever seen”. So you can imagine my surprise when I peered over your shoulder as I walked by and saw you watching a movie on your(?) portable DVD player!
Huh??
You didn’t want to spend that money on some clean clothes? A haircut? SOME COFFEE??!? I mean you were AT the Coffee Bean.
I’m not naive. I know that the chances are very good that you obtained that DVD player through less than honest methods. But I’m also a bit of an optimist. So let’s say you maybe found the DVD player on a trash heap or something (it was a very old model). Here’s my question:
Where did you get the movie you were watching in it?!
I mean I know people throw out players that don’t work, but they usually keep their movies.
As I left the bank and headed back across the Coffee Bean patio to my car, you were still there and you did something I never thought possible. You took my utter amazement to another level…
YOU asked ME for some spare change!!!!!!!!!! Seriously?!?!?!? Sell the goddamn portable DVD player!!!!
Yours in utter bewilderment,
PS — Where do you even go to charge the battery on that thing?!?!?!?!? I’m so confused?!?
I wonder if he killed a businessman for that DVD player? Nah, surely he would have took his clothes as well.
Addendum: Redditted and Stumbled.
HI-FUCKING-LARIOUS!
I know i’m late but i cant stop laughing at this. It’s like dude, where do you even get the marker you’re writing with??