Feb 09 2009
Dear Stevie Wonder’s Manager
Dear Stevie Wonder’s Manager,
Someone should smack you in the mouth! You should be fired…and then maybe smacked in the mouth again. (Note: If Stevie’s manager is a woman, we’ll need a woman volunteer for the smacking. I don’t condone men hitting women. I do condone people getting smacked when they do colossally stupid things). And what you had him do at the Grammy’s was colossally stupid!
Why was Stevie — a musical genius, legend, and icon — performing onstage with the most notorious fad in music history — a boy band? Watching the Jonas Brothers prance around Stevie, while trying to remember the lyrics to “Superstition” (which I’m positive they learned this weekend) was a nauseating disgrace. How often do we get to watch Stevie perform like that anymore? 2 maybe 3 times a year? And you mar it with these guitar playing, pre-pubescent, virgin toolboxes! I’m getting angry all over again just typing this! I hope you’re a man…so I can smack you.
And of course, to top it all off, you managed to get Stevie’s solo performance placed AT THE END OF THE SHOW! Good job, buddy! That’s my favorite way to watch a legend perform — interlaced with Delta and Hilton commercials! Chris Brown AND Rihana drop out of the show at the last minute and I STILL can’t see all of Stevie’s performance?!? Seriously????
Oh and by the way—WTF Chris?!
In conclusion — watch your back Stevie Wonder’s Manager. I may be hiding in the bushes waiting to slap you. I may just stick my hand out of the car window and do a drive-by smacking. I may fed-ex that hand from The Addam’s Family to you and when you open the package — have it slap you. But much like Santa Claus — you’re gonna pay what you owe !!
Yours in outrage,
Preston
That was such an incredible disgrace. Did you notice Stevie’s vocals were completely buried as well? Ugh, that was a sickening display/
I love Stevie (nullus), but Stevie is dangerously close to looking like a Buddhist monk. It pains me to say this but as a fellow balding man, someone has got to cut the braids soon. There is a time to cut your losses…literally. My boys joked me when my hairline looked like an eroding beach. Stevie is half-mooning.
To all, I am so sorry, but you were thinking it too.