http://dearyou.today.com Tue, 07 Apr 2009 17:28:22 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en     Dear Semi-Attractive Woman on the Train: I’ve heard of giving someone “the eye”. I’ve gotten the eye once or twice myself. More aggressive people engage in something fondly known as “eye fucking”. It’s “the eye” on steroids. I’m no “eye virgin”. I’ve ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/04/07/dear-semi-attractive-woman-on-the-train/   Dear Proud Parent of a Poo, Yes, the log you left in the toilet for me to bear witness to was magnificent, and the fine brown spray on the back of the toilet the week before was equally impressive. Please realize though, that beauty is in the eye of the ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/03/18/dear-proud-parent-of-a-poo/ Dear Asian Lady at Target, We shared a moment didn’t we?  I know that we don’t know each other, but for a few seconds we were united in wonder.  I glanced over.  You glanced over.  And then we looked at each other and shrugged as we thought: This chick in front of ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/03/12/dear-asian-lady-at-target/   Reader Submission - Dear Bathroom Conservationist, I appreciate your efforts to conserve toilet seat covers, however, I must say that I am reluctant to use the extra toilet seat cover that you accidentally pulled out and re-stuffed back into the dispenser. I don't know where your hands have been most of the time, ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/03/11/dear-bathroom-conservationist/   Reader Submission Dear Front Line at Chipotle's, When I ordered the 3 Soft Chicken Taco's the other day, I was expecting the bang for your buck type of fillers you once served. I was utterly amazed when I asked for corn --you dropped about 6-7 kernels on each taco. You gave me ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/03/06/dear-front-line-at-chipotles/   One of our readers had a little something to say about yesterday's post : Dear Guy Whose House I'm Leaving, What we had last night was nice. And I am very glad that you are not slackin on yo pimpin, as evidenced by the wood floors. However, what’s done is done, and ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/02/20/dear-guy-whose-house-im-leaving-a-rebuttal/ Dear Ladies Leaving My House In The Morning... It's a wood floor.  The stairs?  Yup they're wood too.  In fact, the only way to get to the second floor, where all the bedrooms are, is to use the stairs.  So what I'm saying is -- we both know you're coming to ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/02/17/dear-ladies-leaving-my-house-in-the-morning/ Dear Budweiser, First of all, thank you.  I’ve always thought that Valentine’s Day was a ridiculous excuse for a holiday and you just legitimized my stance.  It is a day for retailers to feel the love of all of our money lining their pockets.  This just shows me that there is ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/02/12/dear-budweiser/ Dear Stevie Wonder's Manager, Someone should smack you in the mouth!  You should be fired...and then maybe smacked in the mouth again.  (Note: If Stevie's manager is a woman, we'll need a woman volunteer for the smacking.  I don't condone men hitting women.  I do condone people getting smacked when they ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/02/09/dear-stevie-wonders-manager/ Dear Facebook, Let's  be real with each other "facebook friends" are a different thing.  I have 211 friends on facebook -- I regularly talk to about 4 of them on the phone or in person.  The number goes to 10 or 15 if you include the occasional email.  So I ask ... http://dearyou.today.com/2009/02/06/dear-facebook-stop-the-25-madness/